Here are some faithfully reproduced excerpts from the instruction manual for the power augur we’ve just bought (to bore holes for yet more fence posts for yet more fields for our llamas):
• Gasoline planter is designed for drilling and grubbing of yam and burdock planting holes, holes of radio detector, holes of fencing poles …. holes of trees fertilizing and winter whiffing on the ice, ect.
• Full attention and gingerliness are requested for using of this machine.
• Users must be in the state of regain consciousness while seperation.
• Utterly prohibited the using of the machine after drinking, drug-talking or in the stat state of tiredness and sickness.
• Never operating this machine in rainy days, because it possible cause operator slip due to slippery ground.
• Upright the machine,on hand grasp the framepress it downwards.another hand pull the recoil starter start the engine.
• Please pay more attention when operating the incline rock ground surface.
• Somtime,pullthe drill bit upwards, then press it downwards is recommended.
All suggestions for what ‘winter whiffing on the ice’ means are welcome. And rest assured that here at Alder and Notaire’s, Chris and I are always in a ‘state of regain consciousness’, apart from when we’re asleep, so you need feel no ‘gingerliness’ about coming here for your holiday!